Melissa (“Missy”) Lavender graduated with an MBA from the Kellogg School of Business at Northwestern University. Prior to founhttp://www.passionsandpossibilities.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/Missy-Lavender-e1271573084498.jpgding WHF, her professional career was focused on real estate, finance, and investments. Missy is actively involved with her childrens’ schools, a member of the Leader Council for Mercy Homes for Boys and Girls, and sings in the chapel choir at St. Clement Church.Missy lives and works in Chicago with her husband, two children, and their dog Beeb. She has appeared on a variety of media channels, including her recent, intriguing interview on The View, with Whoopi Goldberg.

We recently interviewed Missy on our radio show, The Passions and Possiblities Project and you can listen to her archived show below.  We were especially struck by her desire and perseverence to shed light on an oft-tabooed topic.  A true Passioneer, thank you Missy and Happy Passioneering!

Our Written Interview with Missy

SO: Your definition of “passion” – your “WHY” for being on the planet?

That feeling of ultimate joy – when you want to “dive deep”, when you want to push through real or perceived barriers, when you want to share what you love with everyone around you.

SO: Your biggest passions for serving others, and how you’re expressing them (include hobbies, volunteering, if you wish)?

Besides WHF, I love two organizations that educate, house and feed the soul of young, at-risk children – Mercy Home for Boys and Girls and Josephinum Academy.  I am on the Leader Council at Mercy and get involved with all our events for the boys and girls there.  With Josephinum, I’m committed to bringing our messages of pelvic health to these girls and to adding to their donor base.Finally, I am passionate about music and express that by singing in our church choir, which I affectionately call the “rock ‘n roll Jesus church”!

SO: Your biggest challenge(s) in expressing your passions for serving others and how you’ve addressed them?

Most of the challenges I experience are with WHF.  Primarily it is a funding issue and a name recognition/support issue. Every year, every month, every day we need to be in front of as many people that we can – so that 10 – 20% of them will “get it” and want to help us help women.I also make sure I do a lot of yoga and other restorative work on my body and soul to keep it pumped!

SO: What has been your experience of prosperity, as you define it?

When you have all you need and then some. For me, it was getting to a place of financial self-sufficiency and buying my first house.  In our work, it is when we are recognized and accepted by the science side of where we live – the docs and PT’s.

SO:  The biggest lesson that you’ve learned in making the leap?

When confronted with a challenge or a “no” – ask three times.  It’s amazing, when you give someone a chance to see your request in a different light – with a different “ask”, how the possibilities open up.  It is also a lesson about always having a contingency plan

SO: What’s your support system look like; how did you create it?

My family, friends and business colleagues.  I started First Tuesday 14 years ago as a way to gather like minded, spiritually rich women together to make new connections and increase our base of sister support.

SO: What wisdom do you have for someone who’s scared/discouraged about their own leap?

Change is ALWAYS good.  Fear is the biggest paralyzer – fear of the unknown keeps us small and it is usually more scary to sit and ponder, than to DO.

SO: What’s your next big milestone?

I want to change legislation and health policy, so that our tips and topics of women’s pelvic health are part of what young girls learn in 5th and 7th and 9th grade health classes.  By doing so, we potentially stave off huge health care costs and the pain and suffering of girls and women long-term.

We recently interviewed TV and radio show host, Ryan Ray, on our radio program.  Ryan’s passionate about sharing the stories of those who are pursuing their dreams!   Below is his radio show archive, as well as his “Passion-ography”.

SO: Your definition of “passion” – your “WHY” for being on the planet?

People today have lost their sense of purpose – their own “WHY” for being on this planet. Instead of looking within ourselves, society has trained us to find our “WHY” externally in other people, places and things. My passion is to help people Wake UP!, remember their “WHY,” and remind them that their most heartfelt goals are still possible.

SO: Your biggest passions for serving others, and how you’re expressing them (include hobbies, volunteering, if you wish)?

In August 2008 I began reaching out to the public through a web show designed to inspire others to remember their passion. As the weeks progressed, so did our audience and soon we had outgrown the internet TV studio I had constructed in my bedroom. On April 3, 2009 “Wake UP! Explore your Passion” the TV show was born as we made our debut on LIVE television in Pasadena, CA to 40,000 cable-connected homes in addition to our regular audience of 10,000 weekly viewers through the web.

SO: Your biggest challenge(s) in expressing your passions for serving others and how you’ve addressed them?

If someone had told me that I was going to build an entire TV show, cast and crew from the ground up and that I was going to do it all on a shoestring budget, I would have laughed and thought it impossible.  Before I began down this path I had no background or formal training or experience in television production whatsoever. Needless to say, the learning curve has been tremendous. I believe that when you have a true, heart-centered passion for something, all the resources you need to be successful will make themselves available. While there have been stressful moments, it has been a dream come true and A LOT of fun!

SO: They say that when you do what you love, the rest follows.  What has been your experience of prosperity, as you define it?

In my experience, the single most common factor that people believe is holding them back from their dream is money. I believe that when the timing is right, everything will fall into place, including the money. The trick is to first become crystal-clear about your goals, today. That won’t cost a dime! Then, moving forward, focus on those things that you already have and begin putting those pieces of the puzzle into place. If your passion is true, when the timing is right and you are ready, the missing pieces will come into view, one-by-one.

SO:  The biggest lesson that you’ve learned in making the leap?

First and foremost, it’s OK if it isn’t perfect. That doesn’t mean you do your work carelessly and pay no attention to detail, it means you do the absolute best you can, focusing on every detail as well as the big picture. At the end of the day, you pat yourself on the back, focusing first on what was done well and lastly on those things that still need improvement. Secondly, even though it’s your baby, there will come a time when you have to let go. The only way we can reach our full potential is to work with others, empowering them to be the best they can be. Only then can we reach our greatest goals.

SO: The biggest keys to your success (e.g., talent, quality, skill, etc.)?

No matter how far removed your life experience may seem, there’s something you’ve learned in your past that will help you reach your current goal. I studied graphic design and dabbled in web programming. My skills as a designer have saved me huge amounts of money in creating a web presence and promotional materials for “Wake UP! Explore your Passion”.

SO: What’s your support system look like; how did you create it?

Aside from my own mother’s consistent and unconditional support in everything I’ve ever attempted to do in my life, I’m blessed to have a tight-knit group of friends who share my passion for inspiring change in other people’s lives. When you move bravely forward into the unknown, your courage and sincerity will attract people to you like an electromagnet. Quite honestly, you’ll be surprised where your supporters come from, more times than not being the people you’d least expect!

SO: What wisdom do you have for someone who’s scared/discouraged about their own leap?

Though it’s been said before, it merits being said again: you are your biggest supporter and your worst critic. Regardless of your physical surroundings and regardless of the influences in your life, you have the power within yourself to be successful in ways you never dreamed possible. The true, heart-centered desires you hold deep inside, those that always seem to peek out at you in your happiest and saddest moments, will never die and demand fulfillment. It is your duty in life to listen and act. “How” you’re going to do it should be the least of your concerns. Your job is to become clear about what you want and then take small steps toward your goals. They will continue to evolve and grow as you evolve and grow.

SO: What’s your next big milestone?

My mission, at its core, is crystal-clear: to inspire people to “Wake UP!”. Recently, we’ve returned to the airwaves, this time via an internet radio broadcast. Our goal: to expand the reach of “Wake UP! Radio” to inspire millions of people to put meaning back into their lives by working toward their most heart-felt goals.

Thanks Ryan and Happy Passioneering!

We’re currently seeking two guest blogging Passioneers™ to share candidly your ups and downs along their journey to make a big difference in the world and thrive – to do what you love and have the rest follow.   “Reality blog” weekly for two months and include photos, video, or other snippets of your world.  One of you will receive the complimentary 2-month support of a success coach to reveal the importance of an accountability partner in your journey.

Send us a brief bio, media picture, and a short You Tube video (or audio recording) about why you think you would be a great guest blogger. 

Deadline for submission:  February 26, 2010

Happy Passioneering!

Last week, we spotlighted 16 tips from our Passioneer(tm) interviews about how to leap fully into what you love, as you serve others in the world.  This week, we’re continuing to share tips from our bold, talented interviewees, with the intention to inspire others who may be scared or discouraged about their own leap. 

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. 

• Nearly all of our Passioneers cited courage as a critical element for leaping fully into what they love.  For them, courage is NOT the absence of fear, but rather the moving forward REGARDLESS of fear.  What a huge difference!  A great book on this topic by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D.
• Passioneers have a relationship with their challenges of “Bring it on!”   They welcome challenges as opportunities to deflate their egos, toughen their skin, AND open their hearts.  Rather than avoid challenges, Passioneers embrace them fully.
• Making the courageous leap into your passions requires a strong faith – knowing that you are supported by a giving, abundant Universe.  Remember that the Universe (or whatever you call your higher power) IS on your side, even when it doesn’t seem like it.
• The Passioneers who we interviewed are bulldogs when it comes to perseverence:  they do not give up and are fiercely tenacious in moving forward regardless of their circumstances.  Vince Lombardi said, “Winners never quit, and quitters never win!” (Other Lombardi quotes)
• Successes are always right around the corner, even if you cannot see or believe them yet.   

It Takes a Village to Raise a Passioneer.

• The concept of rugged individualism is dead when it comes to unleashing your passions.   If you think that you have to go it alone, think again.  Passioneer Vitamin C = Collaboration, connection, cooperation, and community. Your booster shot for thriving!
• The most successful Passioneers create powerful support networks that call them into greatness, challenge their comfort zones, and believe in them through thick and thin.  So, go build an “A Team” of cheerleaders who believe in you 200%, when no one else will.  The first step to building your team is to ASK.  The second step?  Be ready to RECEIVE!
• Passioneers also proactively build a “B” team of cheerleaders who they actively recruit to their A team.  They have a positive state of mind to attract and grow strong supporters.
• Build upon your strengths, rather than struggle to strengthen your weaknesses.  Delegate to experts in areas which are not your strengths or your passions.
• Stop renting out mental real estate to naysayers.  The more that you resist the “dream dashers,” the more that they will persist.  What you resist persists.  A great video on this topic.

Do What You Love, Not Just What You’re Good At.

• How do you know if you are following your true passions?  When in doubt, ask yourself, could I do and be this for the rest of my life..and not get paid?  If your answer is  unequivocally “yes,” then you are on the right track.  Or try the Passion Test.  Marsha Sinetar’s book, Do What You Love; the Money Will Follow, is excellent.
• Your passions point to your purpose – that is, why you’re on the planet at this time.  Pay attention to them and give them space in your life.
• Passion = contagion.   When you are on fire about something in your life, you are contagious and unstoppable. 
• Some Passioneers unleash one passion, solely and fully, during their life, while others are “serial Passioneers,” who pursue many different ones.  There is no right or wrong path to pursue your passion. 

Happy Passioneering!

During this year, we have interviewed over 200 bold, talented individuals who have leaped fully into what they love, as they serve others in the world – we call them Passioneers ™.  Our intention is to inspire those who are feeling scared or discouraged about their own leap into service.  Based upon our inteviews so far, we have synthesized the following passioneering tips, and will be blogging on them, and many others, each week in 2010.   If you  have any tips or know of any Passioneers who would like to share their story in our blog, please send us their contact information.

Be A Visionary.

• Dream big.  To create a bigger life, you must have bigger dreams.  Without a vision, the people perish.  (Proverbs 29:18)
• Cordon off at least one focused, quiet hour, each month, for the visioning process.  If you Google “life visioning tools,” you’ll see lots of great visioning tools.   We highly recommend using Rev. Dr. Michael Beckwith’s approach. 
• Share your life’s vision with those you trust, and watch how much faster that it grows!
• Keep your vision front and center, where it can inspire you everyday.  A vision journal or vision board is a great tool for this purpose. Check out vision journaling workshops by Robbi Firestone. 

If You Fail to Plan, You Plan to Fail.

• Create a business plan, even if it’s on the back of a napkin.  Richard Gabel’s tips on this: http://bit.ly/2102E
• What gets written down gets done.  Plain, simple, if not easy.  Journaling is a great tool for this.  Or try writing down the top three things you must get done each day  on an index card; let that be your day’s focus.
• As with your vision, share your business plan with others for input, ideas, and support.
• Try our complimentary PowerLeaps LLC Express Business Plan.

If You Believe, You’re Halfway There.

• Napoleon Hill said “What the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” (more quotes from Napoleon Hill).
• If you don’t believe in your vision, very few others will.
• Even on those days when you really don’t believe in your vision,  try faking it until you make it.  It’s amazing how contagious “acting as if” can be!
• Faith grows over time, one demonstration at a time – kind of like a stairway that you climb, with each step being a small success.  Rome was certainly not built in one day.

Just Do It!

• My good friend Pete DiSantis says, “Do is half of done.“  Talk is cheap, and analysis can cause paralysis!  The boldest, most successful Passioneers move forward regardless of their circumstances.
• Take baby steps, no matter how small they are.  In the midst of feeling overwhelmed and stuck, your taking even ONE small step forward will jump start your inspiration and momentum.  A great article on this approach.
• There is no right or wrong way to express your passions, so avoid comparing yourself to others, especially Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey, celebrities, your next door neighbor, etc., etc.  You get the point…
• Explore and experiment.  Take some risks and try on different approaches.  Most importantly, have FUN!!

 Happy Passioneering!

We would love to hear your own experiences in making the leap into your passions full-time, especially if you are in service to others. In our Passioneer interviews, we hear a variety of rich, inspiring answers that describe each individual’s powerful journey. We invite you to take our very brief Passioneer Survey below and find out how you stack up to other Passioneers. We’ll post the results as they come in. If you leave your email address, we will send you a copy of our Passioneering Tips newsletter. Thanks so much!

Ellen Whitehurst is the CEO and Founder of The Empowered Lifestyle.  A monthly marquee columnist for Redbook magazine, Ellen’s first book, Make Your Lucky Day,is now going into Fourth printing and she is currently working on her second book.  Ellen also writes a daily tip for iVillage.com as well as contributing to other myriad media agendas, including now John Edward’s new site, InfiniteQuest.com as well lifestyle blogging for The Huffington Post.    She is also one of DoctorOz.com’s alternative/complementary/holistic healthcare providers in their new Web 3.0 sharecare program. For more information on Ellen and what sort of fortune and luck this month has in store for you log onto www.ellenwhitehurst.com.

Her definition of “passion”? “That thing, that essence that animates me, that makes me smile, and makes my heart and my soul smile.”

Her biggest passions: Her son.  Feng shui, mystical, metaphysics.  And cooking and serving with food (she’s writing her second book on this topic!).

Summary quote: “There is no one less likely to have made a success of a brand than me.  And I’ve done it.  And if I can do it, anyone can”!

Biggest challenges along the road: Feeling scared and lonely after her 20-year marriage ended and deciding to pursue fully her passion for feng shui.  Says Ellen, “I so firmly believe that if you follow your passion, if you find what it is that you love, it makes it so much easier to be persistent about it.  And persistence is the key to everything on this planet, I swear to you.  You have to have a real well of persistence to get over the obstacles because the obstacles are…really opportunities to learn. And at the time you may think that something that is crushing and disappointing is the end of the road. And I will personally guarantee -I will put money behind it - that that end of the road is simply bringing you to another new road that’s going to bring you closer to what your dreams are.”

How do you know when it’s a boulder to go over or a sign to take another path? She says, “ for me, if you have a passion towards achieving or accomplishing a particular or specific goal, you’ll never get a boulder that will push you off of the path.   You’re never going the wrong way, you are going where you need to be.  If, however, you’re not that passionate about it…you don’t feel it in the seat of your soul…that’s where the concept of trust comes in.  You have to trust that you will be shown.  …Ask your higher power, whatever that is for you, ‘Am I on the right road?’    And then be open to receive the answers.  That’s about as trite as it gets, it’s as banal as it gets, but it’s also as real as it gets. If you can quiet your being and can, from your heart, from emotion, ask your higher power if you’re on the right road, I can tell you that, within 48 hours, you’ll get…confirmation.”

Natural talents/gifts: “I came in with an ability to write.”

What didn’t/doesn’t come naturally: … “the ability to get in front of people and speak”;  not having a business background

How does someone balance commitments & responsibilities with pursuing their passions? “It’s really important that when you have responsiblities, when you have commitments and you’re embarking on doing something, obviously if you feel the need to keep your 9 to 5, to keep your paycheck, temporarily, you still need to push energy forward on some level towards what you’re passionate about.   …The same sort of commitment that you have to paying the bills, to taking care of your parents, or to taking care of the kid’s tuition…that same sort of commitment has to translate into a commitment to what your passion is.  And pretty soon, before you even know it, the passion will overtake whatever the 9 – 5 is, and you will find opportunities flying at you to engage yourself in whatever it is that you’re truly interested in, and will leave the 9-5 behind.”

Definition of “prosperity” and how she is experiencing it.   “I’m going to be a capitalist and say that I define it as something with a dollar sign in front of it.  I could really throw out the line that prosperity is abundance, and I do believe that secondarily.   …I define prosperity as feeling comfortable; as not ever worrying where the next dime is going to come from, or where the next pair of shoes is going to come from, or where the next car payment is going to come from.”

Tip on handling fears: “…You can spend time laying awake in bed at night…and thinking ‘How am I supposed to make the car payment?’   That time that you’re spending worrying about it is in fact, what we call ‘feeding the hungry monster’.”  She suggests that, instead of worrying about it, you can choose to spend the time imagining all of the ways that money COULD come in to cover the car payment.   “Are you going to lay in bed and worry, or are you going to construct a visualization that has you paying it…..either way it’s a fantasy,” she notes.  “Why not choose the one that’s positive?”

…”If you feed your fear with fatted worry you’re just creating more of the same.  So don’t feed the fear.”

Her next big milestone: A second book, focusing  on food and cooking; a television show

Morgan loves spending time with young people. He is currently laughing, playing, reading books, and enjoying every day while raising his two young children. For 12 years prior to spending time with his own kids, he learned with teenagers about communication and increasing self-esteem. He spent time as a high school teacher, an adventure trip leader, a personal growth program facilitator, a mentor, an interim Dean of Students, an advisor, and a friend. These experiences, a Master’s degree from Northwestern University, and a trip around the world on a ship, helped him understand that at the heart of our success as people is confidence in our selves and support and love from other people. He calls these things “Know Yourself” and “Trust Yourself.” It is with the passion to make a difference in people’s lives that he coaches his clients to sustainable and long-term success. He authored the book Launch Your Life: 5 Secrets to Knowing What You Want in Your Teens, College Years, and Early Career. Reach him at www.playhuge.com.

Below is our recent radio interview with him, September 23, 2009:

Jasmine Graham is the Founder and President of Pace For Success Inc. She is a certified coach with the Road runners Club of America and an American Council of Exercise certified Fitness instructor. Pace For Success creates F.I.N.E. HUMAN BEINGS through Fitness, Involvement, Nutrition & Empowerment. Jasmine is currently running a very successful Health and wellness company. She offers Bootcamp Fitness sessions, Running programs and Nutrition programs. Her scope of service is not just limited to fitness and nutrition. Her newest endeavor is her talk show FINE WOMEN that will cover issues related to Fitness, Involvement , Nutrition and Empowerment in every show. She also wants to showcase ordinary people doing extraordinary things in every episode. She decided to create this show because she wanted to empower and effect people in a positive way on a larger scale. The pilot is completed and will be shopped to various networks. She has also been interviewed on various cable programs where she discussed how she changed careers and the importance of a healthy lifestyle. Her life’s passion is to help people be the best that they can be and she is accomplishing that. She can be reached at www.pace4success.com.

Below is her interview with us on Blog Talk Radio, October 2, 2009:

Eileen Dey, M.A. and Reiki master is the director/founder of the only state licensed Eileen is also a counselor and provides on-going “anti-career” support to adults in career transition. Reach her at www.reikitrainingprogram.com.

We interviewed her earlier this year on Blog Talk Radio (Passions and Possibilities Show):

As I’ve been interviewing nearly 100 passionate entrepreneurs (aka “passioneers”) over the past two months, I’ve heard many great ideas and suggestions for dream leaping. So I invite anyone who is feeling scared or discouraged about their own leap to consider the ten tips below from these passioneers, so you can move forward. If you have your own ideas or suggestions, please send them our way.

Tips for Leaping into Your Passions Fully

1. Don’t leave your day job, and have at least one year’s savings before you make the leap into your passions!
2. Take baby steps. A strong recommendation to make the leap by taking many little steps.
3. Face the fear…and do it anyway.  Every one of our guests has felt some fears around making their leap.  Their suggestion?  Don’t succumb and keep moving.
4. Surround yourself with positive people.  Ditch those who aren’t supportive or negative.  Fill your life with folks who respect and honor your path.
5. Vision your future.  Get very clear on what you want in your life and take the focus off of what you don’t want.
6. Prosperity is much more than material wealth.  It means friends, health, free time, and being your own boss!
7. Persevere regardless.  The road will get rocky, so when it does, take a deep breath and put one foot in front of the other.
8. Get used to the mystery.  You aren’t going to always know where you’re headed.  So best to release control and enjoy the ride!
9. Don’t go it alone.  Real success is achieved through other people, so learn to build community around you.
10. Go with the flow.  Following your passions can be tough, AND if you keep hitting a wall, perhaps it’s time to take another route. 

You can also reach us by contacting our website:  www.lifesparks-coaching.com or our radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/passionsandpossibilities.  Thanks so much!!