Conquering Your Fear of Asking: 33 Ways to Get Support for Your Dreams

Posted in Blog, Building Support, Passioneers. Written by Sue Oliver on June 10th, 2010

This month’s Passioneering theme is “Creating Powerful Support Networks”.  That is, to thrive at what you love AND make big, positive contributions on the planet, through other people.  As a recovering do-it-myself-aholic, I know firsthand that you simply cannot succeed alone. Answered prayers come through others, and the more “others” you have, the more abundance you can receive.   Rugged individualism  may have been the American dream in the past, but now it represents a sad, lonely saga.

We recently asked several Passioneers® how they created powerful support networks on their journeys.  Below are some of our favorite responses:

Beth Remmes, Founder of Zola Goods: “I like the visual of widening circles, like ripples in a pond. The main reason I have been able to stay the course is because I have had the sense that this is a divinely-inspired mission, so first and foremost, I have a practice that starts at my center – whether it is yoga, meditation, a hike in the woods, something that keeps my connection to a power greater than myself.”

Shelly Rachanow, best-selling author of If Women Ran the World, Sh** Would Get Done :  “Richard Bach once said, ‘Argue for your limitations and sure enough they’re yours.’  I’ve made a point to surround myself with friends and family who remind me that I can do anything I choose, and who never let me tell myself otherwise.”

Bill Roth, a green entrepreneur and creator of Earth 2017:  “One great advantage of putting your neck on the line is you find out who will chop it off for a buck and who will really help you. Going through those experiences are disheartening but really valuable in the long run because you end with wonderful, trusting relationships.”

Ryan Ray, radio and TV host of WakeUP! TV:  “Aside from my own mother’s consistent and unconditional support in everything I’ve ever attempted to do in my life, I’m blessed to have a tight-knit group of friends who share my passion for inspiring change in other people’s lives. When you move bravely forward into the unknown, your courage and sincerity will attract people to you like an electromagnet. Quite honestly, you’ll be surprised where your supporters come from, more times than not being the people you’d least expect!”

Tammy Gentry, the owner of CMD Gifts and the creator of Penny Stones®.

• “To make my dream a reality, one of my best first steps was to make an appointment with S.C.O.R.E advisors.  They helped me create my business plan, gave me invaluable critical feedback, and helped me think of my product as a business, not a hobby.

• I have partnered with other women entrepreneurs who manufacture products sold to the gift wholesale and retail market.  Developing relationships with people who can relate to your problems, concerns, frustrations, and accomplishments adds another dimension to the rewards of owning your own business.

• Next month, I will be joining a group of women entrepreneurs who meet once a month for three hours and discuss the challenges they face.  These women will become my Board of Advisors.  I have been looking for a support group like this and am very excited to have found one locally ( Akron , Ohio ).”

Jenny Pavlovic, Founder, Author, and Imagineer, 8 State Kate Press:

• “Believe in yourself and your purpose. Share your positive message and supportive people will appear in your life. Notice when they do, and reach out to them. Pay attention because sometimes when the right people appear it seems like a coincidence, but is isn’t. Be prepared to act.
• Limit the time and energy you give to negative people (even if you are related to them!). That will give you more time and energy to spend with supportive people who bring your energy up and share your passion. The law of attraction, you know…”

Patty DeDominic, Chief Coach, DeDominic & Associates:

• “Seek out people who are already doing what YOU aspire to do.
• Surround yourself with people with good attitudes and who are positive and resourceful
• If you can’t Be the Change YOU wish to see.. then find people who are working to make that happen and HELP!”

Scott Gabriel Hummel, Certified Bad Ass, Professional Adventurer, www.gabrielhummel.com:

• “Don’t quit your day job. Test the waters with your new passion before you jump ship completely.
• Focus Hard. If you are serious about making your passion your career, spend your time accordingly.
• Go for it. You won’t know unless you try.”

Here are 18 more ways to build your powerful Passioneer pom pom squad:

1. Remember that when you ask for support, you’re creating an “opportunity” for someone to give.   Let go of niggling worries that you’re bothering someone by asking.
2. Take time to clarify exactly what support you need. A business plan, even on the back of an envelope, helps.
3. Learn to make clear, specific requests for support, including what you want and by when.
4. NEVER EVER pre-judge another person’s ability or willingness to support you. Allow yourself to be pleasantly surprised!
5. Create at least 3 mentoring relationships with experienced, thriving Passioneers who are several steps ahead of you.
6. Read, read, read. Explore everything that’s ever been written and who’s been successful in your passion.
7. For those who believe in a higher power, remember to connect with it on a regular basis through prayer, meditation, and reflection…when things are going bad AND when things are going well.
8. Remember that your support network can be global with a reach far beyond your neighborhood.
9. Let those you can trust know about your dreams for making a big difference and thriving.
10. Remember that support comes in many forms, not only with shared time and finances.
11. EVEN a naysayer can be part of your support team. What becomes possible if you actively solicit constructive criticism, without being overwhelmed?
12. Be grateful for and regularly thank those who are already supporting you. You simply cannot appreciate them too much.
13. Your biggest competitors can be your biggest allies, if you change your perception. What if you collaborate instead of compete?
14. Building a support network is just as much giving as it is receiving. When you ask “How can I help you?”, the other person automatically considers how he might help you too.  So be the support that you seek!
15. Create an advisory team of at least 12 people. Then double it. Advisory team members are those who have subject matter expertise and want to share it with your great cause.  They might also be individuals who exemplify key strengths and values that complement yours.
16. There’s never a perfect time to ask for support. One thing’s for sure: if you wait until the “right time,” it’s too late.
17. Being vulnerable is NOT a weakness, it’s actually a strength.  Ditto for surrendering.
18. Remember that the bigger your dream, the bigger the challenges and the greater the naysaying. Consider that significant opposition can be the highest form of flattery and much better than apathy.

Best wishes and Happy Passioneering!